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I recently got my first anon otherkin “get help” ask.

Thank you for your validation, Anon.

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ghrianleon:

You know, it’s funny. I made what was probably the kindest, most civil and understanding response to this post. You can see it here, if you don’t believe me: https://ghrianleon.tumblr.com/post/175658259804/otherkin-is-not-lgbt

And I was still blocked by the OP without a single response.

I don’t think that people who say these things want any discussion. I think their goal is to start arguments, and silence anyone who tries to actually show reason and sense. I haven’t been on tumblr long, but I have seen a lot of moral posturing disguised as productive discourse. It’s disgusting to me, as a bisexual, that these people are using social justice as a vehicle for plain old rudeness. If you want to make fun of us, just do that. Don’t dress it up behind LGBTQ rights. This is concern-trolling and nothing but. That anyone would use a minority group as a smokescreen for this is childish and inappropriate.

Next time you wonder why otherkin aren’t polite to you all the time, remember things like this. Remember that no matter how nice and patient we are, we know that most of you are more concerned with your public images, and being know-it-alls, than being truthful or fair.

Over the last 20+ years I have learned this:

People who come into our communities with statements like
 “I’m genuinely curious”
 “I’m not here to offend”
 “I want to understand this”
And statements like these, over 95% of the time are trying to disarm you to maximize their trolling.   I may sound jaded but this is experience speaking from over a decade of being part and running my own otherkin communities.

The people who are misrepresenting our community by claiming to be part of it and representing it, are the same deal without the effort of getting into the community in the first place.  Remember folks, anyone can post anything and put it in whatever tag they feel like.  None of these people are interested in an actual debate or discourse about these issues, they just want to smack bees nests without getting stung.

Almost noone is going to come to us with the intention of listening to us explain what we are and how and why we exist, and have an open mind in doing so.   Humans have an innate need to see themselves as above other humans, so they come to communities like ours to “people watch”, which is to say, see people they can justify to themselves are “not as good” as they are.  They are going to troll you, to try to break you down with the same tired arguments which have been answered for decades, to call you crazy, deluded, to tell you to “get help”, etc.   Its all for their own self-esteem because they haven’t dragged themselves out of their basements yet and made something, anything of their own lives.  There are extremely rare exceptions but good luck finding them amongst the trash.

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ghrianleon:

You know, it’s funny. I made what was probably the kindest, most civil and understanding response to this post. You can see it here, if you don’t believe me: https://ghrianleon.tumblr.com/post/175658259804/otherkin-is-not-lgbt

And I was still blocked by the OP without a single response.

I don’t think that people who say these things want any discussion. I think their goal is to start arguments, and silence anyone who tries to actually show reason and sense. I haven’t been on tumblr long, but I have seen a lot of moral posturing disguised as productive discourse. It’s disgusting to me, as a bisexual, that these people are using social justice as a vehicle for plain old rudeness. If you want to make fun of us, just do that. Don’t dress it up behind LGBTQ rights. This is concern-trolling and nothing but. That anyone would use a minority group as a smokescreen for this is childish and inappropriate.

Next time you wonder why otherkin aren’t polite to you all the time, remember things like this. Remember that no matter how nice and patient we are, we know that most of you are more concerned with your public images, and being know-it-alls, than being truthful or fair.

Over the last 20+ years I have learned this:

People who come into our communities with statements like
 “I’m genuinely curious”
 “I’m not here to offend”
 “I want to understand this”
And statements like these, over 95% of the time are trying to disarm you to maximize their trolling.   I may sound jaded but this is experience speaking from over a decade of being part and running my own otherkin communities.

The people who are misrepresenting our community by claiming to be part of it and representing it, are the same deal without the effort of getting into the community in the first place.  Remember folks, anyone can post anything and put it in whatever tag they feel like.  None of these people are interested in an actual debate or discourse about these issues, they just want to smack bees nests without getting stung.

Almost noone is going to come to us with the intention of listening to us explain what we are and how and why we exist, and have an open mind in doing so.   Humans have an innate need to see themselves as above other humans, so they come to communities like ours to “people watch”, which is to say, see people they can justify to themselves are “not as good” as they are.  They are going to troll you, to try to break you down with the same tired arguments which have been answered for decades, to call you crazy, deluded, to tell you to “get help”, etc.   Its all for their own self-esteem because they haven’t dragged themselves out of their basements yet and made something, anything of their own lives.  There are extremely rare exceptions but good luck finding them amongst the trash.

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ghrianleon:

You know, it’s funny. I made what was probably the kindest, most civil and understanding response to this post. You can see it here, if you don’t believe me: https://ghrianleon.tumblr.com/post/175658259804/otherkin-is-not-lgbt

And I was still blocked by the OP without a single response.

I don’t think that people who say these things want any discussion. I think their goal is to start arguments, and silence anyone who tries to actually show reason and sense. I haven’t been on tumblr long, but I have seen a lot of moral posturing disguised as productive discourse. It’s disgusting to me, as a bisexual, that these people are using social justice as a vehicle for plain old rudeness. If you want to make fun of us, just do that. Don’t dress it up behind LGBTQ rights. This is concern-trolling and nothing but. That anyone would use a minority group as a smokescreen for this is childish and inappropriate.

Next time you wonder why otherkin aren’t polite to you all the time, remember things like this. Remember that no matter how nice and patient we are, we know that most of you are more concerned with your public images, and being know-it-alls, than being truthful or fair.

Over the last 20+ years I have learned this:

People who come into our communities with statements like
 “I’m genuinely curious”
 “I’m not here to offend”
 “I want to understand this”
And statements like these, over 95% of the time are trying to disarm you to maximize their trolling.   I may sound jaded but this is experience speaking from over a decade of being part and running my own otherkin communities.

The people who are misrepresenting our community by claiming to be part of it and representing it, are the same deal without the effort of getting into the community in the first place.  Remember folks, anyone can post anything and put it in whatever tag they feel like.  None of these people are interested in an actual debate or discourse about these issues, they just want to smack bees nests without getting stung.

Almost noone is going to come to us with the intention of listening to us explain what we are and how and why we exist, and have an open mind in doing so.   Humans have an innate need to see themselves as above other humans, so they come to communities like ours to “people watch”, which is to say, see people they can justify to themselves are “not as good” as they are.  They are going to troll you, to try to break you down with the same tired arguments which have been answered for decades, to call you crazy, deluded, to tell you to “get help”, etc.   Its all for their own self-esteem because they haven’t dragged themselves out of their basements yet and made something, anything of their own lives.  There are extremely rare exceptions but good luck finding them amongst the trash.

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ghrianleon:

You know, it’s funny. I made what was probably the kindest, most civil and understanding response to this post. You can see it here, if you don’t believe me: https://ghrianleon.tumblr.com/post/175658259804/otherkin-is-not-lgbt

And I was still blocked by the OP without a single response.

I don’t think that people who say these things want any discussion. I think their goal is to start arguments, and silence anyone who tries to actually show reason and sense. I haven’t been on tumblr long, but I have seen a lot of moral posturing disguised as productive discourse. It’s disgusting to me, as a bisexual, that these people are using social justice as a vehicle for plain old rudeness. If you want to make fun of us, just do that. Don’t dress it up behind LGBTQ rights. This is concern-trolling and nothing but. That anyone would use a minority group as a smokescreen for this is childish and inappropriate.

Next time you wonder why otherkin aren’t polite to you all the time, remember things like this. Remember that no matter how nice and patient we are, we know that most of you are more concerned with your public images, and being know-it-alls, than being truthful or fair.

Over the last 20+ years I have learned this:

People who come into our communities with statements like
 “I’m genuinely curious”
 “I’m not here to offend”
 “I want to understand this”
And statements like these, over 95% of the time are trying to disarm you to maximize their trolling.   I may sound jaded but this is experience speaking from over a decade of being part and running my own otherkin communities.

The people who are misrepresenting our community by claiming to be part of it and representing it, are the same deal without the effort of getting into the community in the first place.  Remember folks, anyone can post anything and put it in whatever tag they feel like.  None of these people are interested in an actual debate or discourse about these issues, they just want to smack bees nests without getting stung.

Almost noone is going to come to us with the intention of listening to us explain what we are and how and why we exist, and have an open mind in doing so.   Humans have an innate need to see themselves as above other humans, so they come to communities like ours to “people watch”, which is to say, see people they can justify to themselves are “not as good” as they are.  They are going to troll you, to try to break you down with the same tired arguments which have been answered for decades, to call you crazy, deluded, to tell you to “get help”, etc.   Its all for their own self-esteem because they haven’t dragged themselves out of their basements yet and made something, anything of their own lives.  There are extremely rare exceptions but good luck finding them amongst the trash.

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!!! IMPORTANT PSA FOR AMERICANS !!!

dateawerewolfsuggestion:

PLEASE remember to be cautious of fireworks today as they can frighten local werewolves away and/or cause harm to their hearing! 

Be courteous of stray werewolves in your area, and be sure to check with the local authorities and neighbors to make sure you live in a werewolf-free environment before setting fireworks off!

This goes doubly for werefoxes, we have more of a fight or flight reflex.   I had to hide in the basement for most the night.

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Thought for the Day

dovewithscales:

ghrianleon:

dovewithscales:

studentofluck:

dovewithscales:

There is no verb form of “kin”. You cannot “kin with something”, and “kinning” is not a thing.

The question of whether or not it’s “okay to kin with that” should never even be asked, because it’s not possible to “kin with that” in the first place. You either are a thing or you are not. It is involuntary. Ask instead (at all times) whether or not your words and actions at any given moment may be harmful to anyone else.

Otherkin is who and what we are, not something we do. It is not an action because it is not a choice.

And if you are “kin with” something that means you are their relative. I am not “kin with” dragons. I am a dragon. I am kin with my cousin.

eat my shit susan. i hope you get curb stomped

How very eloquent. You have a real gift. Rarely have I seen such marvelous command of the English language, such clever and creative prose.

How can I possibly disagree after you’ve so thoroughly proven your point? Truly I have seen the error of my ways.

You don’t at all sound like an angry Tumblrkin with no argument at all who stoops to ham handed personal attacks because you’re enraged at being called out for something you know is true. Well done.

Now if anyone has anything intelligent to say I’d be happy to have an actual discussion about the topic. I’d DM this person if they hadn’t blocked me to avoid hearing my response.

I haven’t been a part of otherkin communities for a long time. (Much suppression on my part.) What I’ve seen on tumblr so far has me really dumbfounded. Do real gatherings and conversations happen anymore?

Yes. You just have to know where to look. There’s a list of good blogs in my FAQ somewhere or other. I think it’s in the otherkin masterpost.

Can I just get down with the OP @dovewithscales for a moment and say as someone who has been kin for over 20 years that…

SHE IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.

These people who think you see something and then “kin with it” have absolutely no idea what being otherkin is.  You are born otherkin, it is something that is a life affector, not a life choice.   The process of discovering what you are is part of a life path, and very often its one you instinctually know you’re on before you even know there is a word for it.

I am not saying its impossible that you can’t become otherkin during your life, but this whole thing about “kinning with X” is outside the definition of otherkin.  You will feel your kintype from within, not get it from an external source.  What you are is part of you, it can’t choose you and you can’t choose it, you can only discover it as a part of what you are.

TL;DR Tumblr/Internet PLEASE stop equating “otherkin” with “permission to take on X identity as a persona”.  You aren’t getting it.  If you really feel you “identify as something”, then take the time to stop and figure out why, and when you have, THEN come out as otherkin.   You owe this introspection mostly to yourself, to thine own self be true, if not to anyone else.

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The fae do not conform to the stereotypes humanity has given them.

Those who say “The fae are all beautiful and cute”, are wrong.  Just as the ones who say “we are all hideous and malevolent creatures”.   Those who say “The fae cannot lie,” are wrong, just as the ones who say “The fae always lie”.  Those who say “The fae want to kill you” are wrong, just as the ones who say “The fae want to keep you safe” are.  There is no “One fae way”, and looking for it is folly.

The fae are even more varied than humanity in how we interact, what feelings we have towards humanity and nature.  For we are the spirits of nature.  We can sense who are our allies and who are our destroyers.  It is hard for humans to understand us, and sometimes they feel there is deceit involved in our ways, but there isn’t.   However if you want to know if there is a secret to understanding our ways, know that the closer you are to nature, the easier it will be.

There are fae that are cute and tiny and live in your flowers.  Just as there are fae that will tower over your castles.   A “cute” and stereotypical fae may be more malevolent than you can imagine, and the old hags may save your life.   Judging us on appearance will work against you always.

There are some blogs that ignore my asks and stopped posting in the fae tags because they know I am here.  Because they want fae their way and don’t care about what is real.   They want their take on fae to be real.  But I suppose if you just want a space where things conform to your reality, go off I guess.

But for everyone else, know that we do not conform to your reality.  The moment you think you know us is the moment you find out you don’t, that there is so much more to know, and the fae will never fit into one of your boxes.

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I guess before Pride Month is over I should post some bisexual art.  Of myself.

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I guess before Pride Month is over I should post some bisexual art.  Of myself.